Butterrrrrr;

We all know how disgusting butter is for you. All the saturated fat it contains.

Well apparently Kiwi's have the highest consumption of butter per person, worldwide. Something like 8 killos per person, per year!! Australia is only 3kg per person. Haha. I say only.  I'm going to use the holier-than-thou tone because I don't eat butter. (pretty much.)

But seriously... That's disgusting New Zealand!!!

Mother monkey;

Tully Makker

"I used to sing
I used to be
Disconsolate, alone, yet free
Now that my soul has been encased
Whatever will become of me?.... "

Paulina Simmons

Baby Rhino;

I used to write. I used to love it.
And then some people got hurt. Some people got confused.
I was thinning the line between idealistic living and reality.
Safe to say that I've missed it. But careful not to even put a toe over the line.

Some things are just meant to be kept private.

But what's happenning? Who is this girl??
... Who knows...

I had a great time back in Malaysia. Who wouldn't, surrounded by the greatest people. Old school friends who know you better than you know yourself. Even after a year of silence we come back and it's still all there. No doubt we've all changed. A lot.
But then I wonder, do we still love each other the way we did? Or are we more in love with the idea that we can come back to the best friends we've had in our whole life, and nothing's changed?
I pray that we do not throw it all away.

Being back in Wellington just feels so... unfulfilling. Uni doesn't start for another 5 weeks. The boyfriend has gone for another 5 weeks to South Africa. To work as a volunterr in a wildlife rehabilitation centre and he gets to play with baby Rhinos! It's baby season now. How unbelievable. 
Last night, this wave of jealousy came over me. And I had to do a double take, because it was indeed the wrong type of jealousy. Enough said. I prayed that I could feel one hundred percent, genuinely happy for him to be able to have such an amazing experience. The kind of happiness a mother would feel for their son, who has succeeded in something they are passionate about.

Other than that, I'm looking for a flat with 3 other girls. It's proving to be the mad mission. There's either nowhere available, or too expensive, or out in the bloody wop wops.
Might end up living alone this year.
Great.

My thousandth attempt at reignition;

Yeah, okay so this is just getting silly guys!
Why do I bother keeping a blog that I never write in anymore? Nobody loves me for it anymore. So nobody's going to visit my page.
It's all quite pointless isn't it.
... Sentimental value, most likely!

Hmmm.. It's starting to look a little childish, don't you think? I'm 18 years old forgoodness sake!
Well no, 19 years old tomorrow! Oh, indeed.

What difference does it make, the constant drone onwards, upwards, older and uglier. What's a larger digit on your age? 19 years old has got no real significance to me. I mean who the hell wants to be 19? The most un-special age there is to be while still being called a youngster.

Now, 16 was a good age. My favourite number. Got hurt the most.
17, still considered young, but had the most fun.
18, learnt the most. Especially about myself. Seeing glimpses of that person.

19 better have something significantly special about it. Stupid piece of shit age, better not let me down.

Let's do it aye, live this 19 year olds' life with a passion.

I will inspire your interest, reignite your love for me. Just give me time.